The Cow Threat

http://www.popularmechanics.com/outdoors/survival/tips/cow-attack-survival-guide?click=pm_latest


Of course, I lie awake at night from this terror.  Lord knows that cow attacks loom darkly over the DC area.  I am doing my best to fight this scourge and am planning on frequenting Five Guys even more often.  The strategy seems to be working, as I am unaware of any cow attacks in this area.  No need to thank me, I'm happy to do my part.